People who ask for help but then don't take it.

Originally posted in the Los Angeles Rants & Raves section of Craig's List on July 26, 2007

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Do you fall into any of these categories?

1. You go to the doctor with a badly fractured arm, but after x rays and other doctors confirm the fracture, you tell him he's nuts, that all you have is a cold, and you're going home to drink some orange juice.

2. You are towed to the mechanic, who carefully examines your car and explains that your four tires are flat. You however, are firmly convinced that everyone else on the planet has over-inflated tires and yours are the way everyone's tires SHOULD be. Then you drive off in a huff.

3. You walk into a McDonalds and order a Whopper. The man behind the counter smiles and explains you are in a McDonalds, and Whoppers are the burgers sold at Burger King. You explode into a temper tantrum, wildly denouncing the fast food industry as a whole and cursing them for not calling all their sandwiches the same thing.

4. Your computer consistently locks up and blue screens. You take it to the I.T. guy at your office, who busts his ass diagnosing the problem and finally announces you have several problems, among them a bad RAM module and multiple bad sectors on your hard drive, along with a multitude of sh!t software that you've downloaded and other crappy programs that are gumming up the works. After he orders replacement parts and reinstalls the OS and xfers your files, you immediately take the machine home and re-download all the sh!t that contributed to the crash in the 1st place. When your system locks up again, you bring it back and shrug when the I.T. guy asks how it all got reinstalled, mumbling something about gremlins and a spectre that is haunting your house.


If you do fall into one of these categories, would you do us all a favor and head down to the nearest bar, where you can have as many drinks as your credit card will allow, and then climb the nearest 10 story building and prove to everyone that your unusual molecular structure mixed with alcohol will grant you the power of flight.


Thank you in advance.

Signed,

The I.T. Guy in # 4